He called today... We talk abit.. then the past was dragged in... I admit, I am still veri affected by what happened that day... I felt as if I was the most useless person in tis world.. Little does he know, I make myself a scar on my hand to remmber how hurt i am.. till tis day, the scar has not heal yet... onli Huey know exactly what happened on tat day... till now, it still hurts.. somehow, now, when come to tink of it, I was stupid to do that..
If he were to call a few months b4, mayb i will still listen to him talk, still find comfort in him, still agree to wat he say.. but now, no.. when he called, i tried to convince myself that he is a friend who is concern.. and i shld let the past go. This is something tat i hav been telling myself but somehow, it is not working.
I simply cannot forget what he did to me, how he hurt my heart, and how i hurt myself b'cos of this. It was foolish.. but forgetting is not easy... I forgave him already.. that is for sure... but i take it as all those things have never happened before. It's not possible. I'm not blamin him. I 'm blaming myself for being so stupid.. I know I'm childish.. but tat's me....
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Doe wif contradictions.. now to happenings..
I went church today.. I saw Mdm Mag's daughter... She is so cute... she is 7 months old.. and she weighs 10kg.. veri bubbly.. I shld be visiting her next week.. still tinking wat to get for her.. hehe.. Then i went to meet Qiqi for lunch.. It was kind of like present exchange for me and her.. I made something for her.. and she brought something for me.. haha.. Anyway, I'm lookin forward to her b'dae.. cos i dunno wat her reaction would be when she see the presents.. haha...
Quite a no of birthdays coming..
~Ari: 4th Oct
~Zati: 9th Oct
~Jun Xian: 10th Oct
~Cindy: 12th Oct
~Eugene: 18th Oct
~Li Feng: 18th Oct
~Lianchun: 19th Oct
~Huey: 23rd Oct
~Jae: 28th Oct
~Hong: 31st Oct
~Jia Yu: 1st Nov
~Dan: 2nd Nov...
Tat's quite a number... mus start to eat less and save up.. haha..
Have a nice weekend people...
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